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Why the NFL sucks

Oh, we meant to say "Why the NFL sucks . . . except for the Patriots." Sorry. And prepare yourself for a sporting screed.
Tales of the No Fun League; judging the judges; parsing the Pamphlet of Record
By PHILLIPE AND JORGE | January 07, 2011

Sports blotter: In the rough

Another day, another New York sports icon fends off a rape allegation.
Did Johan Santana go out of bounds? Plus, LT's self-abuse defense falls short.
By MATT TAIBBI | July 02, 2010

Sports Blotter: Dead Duck

The saga of the University of Oregon football team grows sadder and sadder.
Oregon's Masoli finally stalls out; plus, a World Cup ambush, and Florida strikes back
By MATT TAIBBI | June 25, 2010

Cardinal sin

Here's one you don't hear every day. J.J. Hones, a point guard on the Stanford Cardinal women's basketball team, has been dismissed from the squad for a DUI. No big deal, right? Happens all the time in college sports.
Drunken golf-cart fun at Stanford; plus, an aspiring NHL goon takes his show off the ice
By MATT TAIBBI | June 18, 2010

Bust busted

Bring up the topic of biggest NFL draft busts of all time and most people come up with the same short list of notorious names, all of them quarterbacks.
Keith McCants mccan't stay out of trouble; plus, another Clockwork Orange homage
By MATT TAIBBI | June 11, 2010

Phillip Merling: Oh, baby

This week's foul NFL news emanates from down South, where Miami Dolphins defensive lineman Phillip Merling was busted for assaulting his pregnant girlfriend.
A Dolphin gets flagged for illegal hands to face; plus, Zach Randolph resurfaces
By MATT TAIBBI | June 04, 2010

Parental advisory

An exceedingly bizarre sequence of events transpired this past week — the parents of two different playoff-competing NBA players were arrested in separate incidents, one on each coast.
The pros take a back seat to their misbehaving moms and dads
By MATT TAIBBI | May 28, 2010

Spring fever

The Lawrence Taylor case is progressing, and as expected, each passing day upchucks new sordid details into the gossip-o-sphere.
LT’s self-abuse defense, a bag job at Notre Dame, and heading back to school in Texas
By MATT TAIBBI | May 21, 2010

Sacked

We always knew Lawrence Taylor was a good bet to get in trouble.
NFL Hall of Famer Lawrence Taylor takes another hit
By MATT TAIBBI | May 14, 2010

Facebook fracas

Sooner or later, Facebook had to figure into the sports-crime scene. There are at least two cases now of pro football players getting arrested for assault in fights resulting from their wives looking at their Facebook friends lists.
Clinton Hart has one too many friends; plus, a pack of ’Dawgs starts chasing the Ducks
By MATT TAIBBI | May 07, 2010

Mirror, mirror

Virtually every year, like clockwork, a college-football player is arrested for getting blasted and then running around town vandalizing cars — a crime that almost always involves ripping multiple side mirrors off of multiple automobiles.
Smashing up cars in South Alabama; Plus, it's that frisky NFL draft time of year
By MATT TAIBBI | April 30, 2010

QB freak

Trying to parse the situation with Pittsburgh Steelers quarterback Ben Roethlisberger and his sexual-assault allegations, one comes to some interesting conclusions. The strategy pursued by law enforcement in this case speaks volumes.
No charges for Roethlisberger, but Big Ben’s reputation might be sacked
By MATT TAIBBI | April 23, 2010

Cookie monster

The Florida International University football program was rocked recently when running back Kendall Berry was stabbed to death in front of eight witnesses — allegedly by an ex–FIU teammate.
Senseless tragedy at FIU; plus, late-night fun at Marshall and some Oregon fallout
By MATT TAIBBI | April 16, 2010

The dumbass chronicles

Right about now, every football fan in America is asking him- or herself the same question: if Shaun Rogers is dumb enough to bring a gun to an airport, what did the guy score on the Wonderlic?
Shaun Rogers flunks out; plus, fun at the clubs with the Pittsburgh Steelers
By MATT TAIBBI | April 09, 2010

Number two blues

As we approach NFL draft season, it’s fun to look back at those great draft prospects of yore, the workout warriors and combine heroes who titillated coordinators, coaches, and fans leading up to the big selection day in New York.
Ryan Leaf’s sad story continues; plus, Ronnie Brown driving wild in Atlanta
By MATT TAIBBI | April 02, 2010

Pirates' ransom

Well, enough of the funny stuff with the Oregon Ducks’ recent crime wave. This week, we’re back into the world of straight-out, nasty, pointless, idiotic violence, committed by young athletes with everything to lose and only a few bucks to gain.
The fun in Oregon is over, as east-coast athletes go on a kidnapping spree
By MATT TAIBBI | March 26, 2010

Kelly's zeroes

Like Bob Beamon's long-jump record or Joe DiMaggio's hitting streak, it was once thought that no organized sports team would ever approach the string of arrests racked up by the infamous Portland Jail Blazers club of the early 2000s.
Oregon Football makes the leap and pays the price; plus, taser fun on the Bayou
By MATT TAIBBI | March 19, 2010

What the Duck?

The burgeoning crime wave wracking the University of Oregon Ducks football team — reporters out there are calling it the "bird flu" — has now spread in an unexpectedly hilarious direction.
Oregon, again; plus, all the news that's fit to steal, and home invasions at the Citadel
By MATT TAIBBI | March 12, 2010

Lame Ducks

Wow, it sure has been a nasty couple of weeks for the University of Oregon and football coach Chip Kelly.
Oregon football closes in on infamy; plus, a Villanova Wildcat needs litter training
By MATT TAIBBI | March 05, 2010

Oregon fail

This is the time of year when you start seeing a lot of arrests involving non-draft-eligible college-football players — underclassmen, mainly.
With no one to hit on the field, underclassmen take to the streets
By MATT TAIBBI | February 26, 2010

Rocky pot

Late last May, a goofy-looking guy named Charles Austin Corn — a student at the University of Tennessee — was shot in South Knoxville in what looked like an attempt to rob his stash. He was unable to communicate with police after the shooting and died fi
It's murder time in Tennessee; Plus, Warren Sapp gets flagged for hands to the face
By MATT TAIBBI | February 19, 2010

NBA shoot-around

Sometimes, even superstar athletes just wear out their welcome. When Gilbert Arenas came into the league back in 2001, and especially after he moved to the Wizards in '03, "Agent Zero" was poised to be the next big thing in basketball.
Gilbert Arenas brings the Bullets back to Washington. Plus, a D-lineman dustup.
By MATT TAIBBI | January 29, 2010

The dark knight

By his calling card alone, Sir John Hargrave sounds like he may be a world-renowned botanist, or the first man to set foot in some remote part of Papua New Guinea.
Merry prankster Sir John Hargrave is a square peg at a round table
By IAN SANDS | July 10, 2009

CMJ in one day

The Gray Lady of indie music fests ain’t what she used to be
By CHRIS FARAONE | October 29, 2008

‘Jock-ular’ election coverage

Yes, today the Providence Phoenix is celebrating its 30th anniversary, including the 10-year run of the NewPaper, and P+J are so proud to have been here the whole time.
How Mike Ditka almost became the Republican heir-apparent
By PHILLIPE AND JORGE | October 22, 2008

By ALAN LUPO | February 07, 2008

Skell of the year

Much less funny than usual, was 2007.
Sports crime: 2007 in review
By MATT TAIBBI | December 18, 2007

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